One Task at a Time
Get up. Brush teeth. Shower. Eat Breakfast. Let dogs out. Go for a walk. No, no that’s all too much. Revise list. Get up. Wait, I don’t want to do that. Revise again. Brush teeth, if only to get that disgusting taste out of your mouth. Good. I can do that. Shower. But I showered yesterday; everyone keeps telling me that I shouldn’t wash my hair as much as I do. My dog is barking. I can’t be there for it right now, I can’t even be here for myself. Okay, focus. You’re going to get up, brush your teeth, shower and say to hell with them while you wash your hair, though maybe you’ll skip conditioning. That process takes forever. What’s next? Eat breakfast. I’m bored with breakfast. Cereal just isn’t going to cut it today. No, food sounds good, though, so cereal will suffice. Let dogs out. I know that I have to, but, damn, it can be such a chore. Am I still in bed? Get up, damn it! Seize the day, even when that little voice is telling you that seizing the day is just going to have to wait until tomorrow.
Depression is a serious health problem. It’s not something that one can simply ‘get over’ and it’s not something that a person can simply choose to not have. Depression is caused by a chemical imbalance in the brain, usually a deficiency in Serotonin production, and it is as much a medical condition as Diabetes. There isn’t any control over it, it's just something that afflicts a portion of the population, same as any other common illness.
It can be hard some days to even get out of bed. Today, I’m feeling that pull of the sheets to just stay where I am. This week has been hell. So many things have gone wrong and a really tough day is coming up for me: the day my little brother passed away from cancer. Combine a crappy week and a hard day with a chemical imbalance and you get an internal monologue similar to the one above.